Last week the WBFF blog was a little light on content, don’t you think? And while it would be easy to blame it on the recovery I needed from the college reunion the prior weekend, that’s not really the reason at all. The last two days for Julie and I have been full of feedings, interrupted sleep, crying, cleaning up accidents and 5am wake-up calls. If you’re thinking that we welcomed a little bundle of joy into our lives, you’d be right. On Thursday morning we adopted….a four-month-old…little girl…named Molly. She’s healthy, happy and loves to chew on Bull Penis!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here are some stats for you to digest while wondering how the hell someone would allow me to adopt a living creature:

10: Number of shelters/animal control centers we visited over a three-day span before finding the right puppy

1: Number of times a shelter told us we could adopt a dog we really wanted, only to inform us two minutes later that they made a mistake and another family already put a hold on that dog

1: Number of people who cried when the aforementioned teasing happened (I’ll let you guess who that was)

1: Number of visits to the Vet’s so far

47: Number of questions we were prepared to ask the Vet as first-time dog owners

44: Number of questions we forgot to ask the Vet

2: Number of shots Molly got on Friday (2nd round of vaccinations + deworming)

62: Number of dirty looks Molly gave us after we let the Vet give her shots and jam a thermometer up her ass

2: Number of times Molly puked in the car

1: Number of times Julie blamed me for a car-puking because I just had to go through Wendy’s drive-thru for a fountain Diet Coke, prolonging Molly’s car ride

83ish: Number of times we’ve thought Molly was dying because we have no clue how a normal puppy is supposed to act

4: Number of times we’ve questioned whether the adoption shelter we got Molly from was legitimate or not

1: Number of times Molly has tried to eat by sucking on my bare nipple (here’s hoping for more)

6: Number of dog-owning friends we consulted with on all things dog before adopting

6: Number of dog-owning friends whose advice we ignored the moment we brought Molly home

27: Number of dog-related google searches in the past 48 hours (some examples: “how often should you brush a dog’s teeth”, “best dog food for a puppy”, “puppy too lethargic”, “puppy too energetic”, “puppy seizures while sleeping”)

12: Number of dog supply items purchased on Amazon…with us thinking we wouldn’t need to buy anything more for a while

12: Number of additional dog items we’ve had to purchase from Petco/PetSmart in two days

40: Percent of Molly’s peepee times that have happened in the correct spot (as opposed to the 60% that have landed on the carpet)

7: Number of months we were going to wait before getting a dog after we initially discussed it

2: Number of months we actually waited