In case anyone needs help deciding whether this Saturday is a good day to do family stuff or chores around the house, let me show you what my day is going to look like:

9:30AM: New York Rangers/Washington Capitals Game 2 – Try to watch this game while I pretend to enjoy family breakfast with my girlfriend and dog.

2:30PM: Show up at my favorite sports bar because things are about to get crazy.

3:00PM: The 139th Kentucky Derby – I’ll be making a small bet on a random horse with longshot odds just to have something to root for during this event.

4:00PM: Toronto Maple Leafs/Boston Bruins Game 2 – Hockey is the greatest playoff sport there is. If you try to argue against this fact, you are an idiot and I don’t want to talk to you.

4:30PM: Anaheim Ducks/Detroit Red Wings Game 3

5:00PM: Chicago Bulls/Brooklyn Nets Game 7 – Basketball is the worst playoff sport there is, but even I can get semi-interested in a game 7.

5:00PM: Boston Red Sox/Texas Rangers – Best team in baseball is must-watch TV.

6:00PM: San Francisco Giants/Los Angeles Dodgers – Probably only relevant in my neck of the woods.

7:00PM: St. Louis Blues/LA Kings Game 3

7:30PM: Floyd Mayweather/Robert Guerrero fight – I don’t even like boxing but might as well cap the day off with one final event.

And don’t forget Cinco de Mayo is Sunday, but plenty of people are sure to be celebrating on Saturday.

Speaking of Sunday, don’t assume you can follow my lead on Saturday and save all your chores for Sunday because we might be dealing with four game 7’s in the NBA playoffs and 13 hours of playoff hockey on Sunday.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you when you’re stuck in the checkout line at Ikea desperately trying to get updates on all these games via Twitter.