Day: February 14, 2012

What is Rmurdera, King of Romance, doing for Valentine’s Day?

Posted on by Ross Gariepy

Rmurdera’s 4 simple steps to Valentine’s Day Perfection:

1). Celebrate Valentine’s Day on any other day but Valentine’s Day!  Much like New Year’s Eve’s reputation of being amateur hour for people partying in the city, V-day is the same way for lovers.  Reservations are nearly impossible to come by (especially when you wait until Feb 8th to start planning), and your favorite restaurants are overrun with newly-dating couples and miserable groups of girls who are completely faking happiness for one night.

Rmurdera took his girl out for a romantic dinner this past Saturday night.  French bistro all the way…including a menu full of words that required access to google translate.  It’s always romantic when you ask the waitress to explain the menu to you as if you’re a 5-year-old.

2). You need a post-dinner plan…and it needs to be more elaborate than “I hope she invites me back to her place after.”  There has to be a buffer between dinner and what you think is gonna go down once you go back to her place.  Why?  Because if you’re like Rmurdera, then you forced your girlfriend to eat a 5-course meal complete with 2lbs of lamb, a bucket of fries and a salad full of bacon and other meats*.  And this means she’s not feeling like immediately taking her clothes off…she probably complained about feeling fat before she even got 2 steps out of the restaurant.  Find a way to waste a few hours before going home.

After dinner on Saturday, Rmurdera took the girl to a comedy show.  Not only did this take care of the issues presented in the previous paragraph, but it also got her in a laughing mood.  You see, the only redeemable quality that Rmurdera has in his bag of tricks is an average sense of humor.  Therefore, by getting the girl in a laughing mood, it was easier to make her laugh at his lame jokes.  Somehow this makes him seem even more charming, and ultimately more desirable.

3). What happens next?  Well you’ll have to use your imagination.  If Rmurdera told you about how his Saturday night ended, he’d have to put a disclaimer on this site saying: “You must be 18 years old or older to continue reading.  Please enter your birth date for access.”

4). Don’t completely ignore actual Valentine’s Day.  Only an idiot would do that.  Even though you’ve already become a champion V-day celebrator, she’s still hoping you’ll do something cute for her on the actual day.

Rmurdera is having the girlfriend over tonight for some homemade pizza and quality time with him & his 2 weird roommates.

Hope this helped…Rmurdera’s off to go find a homeless-looking vendor for some last minute flowers & chocolate.

* This is a gross exaggeration of what my girlfriend ate on Saturday…and this clarification should help me not get the silent treatment later tonight.

Statement of Intent (aka what the fuck this blog is supposed to be about)

Posted on by Ross Gariepy

In the brief but riveting history of the WBFF blog, Rmurdera has fielded a ton of questions from avid readers, all with the same underlying theme of, “We wanna know what this blog’s about before we invest even a nanosecond of our time into it.”

The questions range from “what’s the point of this blog?” to “tell me, after reading your Travel Blog, your Marathon Blog, your Meh Blog and even your highly-incriminating Randomness Blog all out of courtesy, why should I put in the time to read another publication you’re likely to abandon the first time you struggle to be creative?”

Fair questions indeed, but this blog is different.  All those other blogs either had a natural expiration date (end of worldwide travels, completion of the marathon, end of college) or had terrible working conditions due to an oppressive, censor-embracing founder.  This leads to yet another question a loyal reader asked Rmurdera today.  Is this just a blog of Rmurdea & Friedchips fighting via blog posts?  If so, why don’t they just use a shared google doc and spare the public from this nonsense?  Rmurdera promises after the initial airing of grievances phase that just passed, Friedchips & Rmurdera are after one common goal–creating a dominating blog that gets as many as 45 unique views per day.  As a sign of the writers’ unity, Friedchips & Rmurdera will partake in friendly debates via email from time to time…and those will go up on the blog.

That’s just one of many new features on the WBFF blog.

This blog will literally include everything that goes through the head of a brilliant young man who lives in a big city, drinks too much alcohol, spends most of his money on nights he doesn’t remember and generally hates to work hard at anything.

You can expect more reader engagement in conversations on a variety of topics like sports, city living, tv & movies (I can’t get anyone to go see Joyful Noise with me), and how it’s still surprising when your pee smells after eating asparagus.

While there might be articles that comment on a mainstream piece of news every so often, don’t hold your breath.  Rmurdera doesn’t read or watch the news, and he certainly doesn’t know politics.  Either Friedchips will cover those areas, or no one will.

You can also expect the appearance of the blog to continue to change.  There’s so much goodness on this site that it’s going to take weeks to settle on the perfect visual presentation.

And finally, there’s an important task for you, dear reader.  Unlike other blogs, the WBFF blog will not compromise quality for quantity.  If the writers aren’t truly inspired by a topic, they won’t post.  At the same time, it’s frustrating for readers to be constantly refreshing the page and not getting new content.  Therefore, your best bet is to click the “follow this blog” link on the right side of the page.  That way you’ll get emailed with each new post.  And the other important job you have is to call out posts that are shitty, uninspired or overly offensive (you’re also allowed to leave comments of encouragement).

Get ready for some mind-numbing discussions, and don’t forget to spread the word…we’re a long ways from that 45-viewer stretch goal.